St paddys day special - The 10 greatest (or worst) things you THINK while drinking

(good to see That Kid is hard at work)

One of the first things I ever learned about alcohol was that it tastes great. Years later, when I was a sophomore in high school, we learned in health class how alcohol leads to impaired judgment - not as great.

That would have been a good thing to know before I pre-gamed way too hard before that 6th grade valentine’s day dance.

Listed below are more impeded judgments that you’ve totally thought/had too:





#10 That floor started shit with ME!!
What was I suppose to do, that floor was rollin up on me. He was packin with all his bros too- the wall, counter top, I had to throw the first punch. The only acceptable display of violence while drinking should be smashing bottles out behind Wawa.


#9 These stairs are totally level
Its a straight shot right across, no drop or slope or anything like that. Let's go.......wow that hurt.


#8 McDonalds sounds good right now
Doesss it? Grab a apple - it'll all taste the same to you at this point.


#7 Smokin this pack of butts would totally make me look like the man right now
Let's look at the pros of smoking this whole pack right now: I’ll be the man, I’ll look like the man, I’ll feel like the man. Cons - i'll have a nice new set of Goodyear tires in my lungs by morning


#6 I neeeeed to buy this!
It probably looks awesome now but wait until you check your bank statement in the morning. That headache won't be from just the booze - a waterslide??? When was this a good idea????

#5 This is the bathroom right???
Its weird, I thought that alley out back looked like the bathroom too. Apparently that cop wasn't the bathroom attendee either

#4 this black kid would love a black joke
Doubtful



#3 We don't need a fucking chaser !!!
Ohh you will after that cheap cheap blue drank touches your lips



#2 Oh. Me yAa imgoodto drive. Noo way Jose. Where are. lost myy keyzz?! I'm sleeping on the couch broo
As a wise man once said: if you can't find it, you can't drive it.

  #1 She's totally 18
famous last words





everyone be safe today and have a
HAPPY ST. PADDY'S DAYY
-from all three of us at Dez Blogzz